Each family has a name or two that sort of gets passed down though the generations. In our family, it's "John". John Clarence Newell (my grandfather) , John Lyndon Newell (my uncle) and John Evans Newell (my son). Sort of a neat thing those family traditions, except when they are encountered by a flustered mom with a cell phone.
So... John Evans (the son) and Jessica are helping at our church's Vacation Bible School. Cindy and I go to pick them up... we have a little trouble locating John.... John has a cellphone... Cindy tries to dial him up... in her address folder, John Evans and John Lyndon (the uncle) are adjacent... guess which one she dials?
Somewhere nestled deep in the Berkshires of Massachusetts, in a sleepy little town, at the end of a beautiful late spring day, the phone rings. "Hello." "John? (this doesn't sound like John) " "Yes." "John? (this can't be John, but I dialed the right number) " "Yes. (who is this? what's going on there? sounds like a frat party)" "Have you found your sister? (don't play dumb with me, bub)" "Sister? Who is this? (and why is this woman so angry with me?) "Oops, wrong number, sorry! (I hate cellphones, they are a tool of Satan) " click.
A few minutes pass and then Cindy realizes what she's done. She hurriedly redials John (the uncle), this time on purpose. Somewhere nestled deep in the Berkshires of Massachusetts, in a sleepy little town, at the end of a beautiful late spring day, the phone rings again. This time however, Linda, worried that she may be dealing with a stalker, grabs the phone. "Hello. (please let it be a telemarketer)" "May I speak with John, please? (kill them with kindness, that's what I always say) " "May I ask who's calling? (I can't believe this crazed female has the nerve to call here again) " "This is Cindy Newell, John's niece. (like at this point she's really going to believe that)" "(giggle, giggle, laugh out loud) Just a moment. (I think we just found the female lead for the sequel to Fried Green Tomatoes)"
We ended up having a wonderful chat with John Lyndon, it just took awhile to get there. And, by the way, we eventually found John Evans and Jessica, and wound up at Starbucks for an iced latte and a few more laughs at mom's expense. No, Linda, we're not crazy, just somewhat challenged in the area of wireless communications. We love you guys.
"The music is perpetual, it is the hearing that is intermittent" - Thoreau
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- Evans Newell
- Kennesaw, Georgia, United States
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The passion of my heart is to worship God through the musical gifts he has given me. Since the summer of 2008 I have been serving First Baptist Church of Kennesaw, GA as the Equipping Pastor of Worship and Administration. I hold a B.A. in Music and a B.A. in Computer Science, and have a beautiful bride and three precious children.
4 comments:
Okay - I'm so glad that I'm not the only one without all of my faculties! I loooooove it and after this crazy weekend, it was the giggle that I needed. SO, dear ones, thanks for the giggle at your expense. ;)
Evans, beautifully written! I was a bit concerned for awhile, as I've known a few crazy sounding ladies, but none, as I recall, named Cindy. Perhaps my memory was failing.
We live on a street, by the way, with three Lindas living next to each other.
Ya'll have a great summer.
i think we need to do better than once a week! i know you're busy and all, but...
FUNNY thing about the JOHN story is I actually called the WRONG John, once when I MEANT to be calling Uncle John. "John Cell" in my cell phone means John L....but since John Newell had recently given me new number...I called "John Cell" thinking it was Uncle John and started talking about Roger and Mom coming into town and going to see the Red Sox and extra tickets....and John L was surprised that I was asking HIM to go to the Red Sox game with MY parents...especially since he is seriously involved with another friend of mine and he is a Canadian hockey fan and couldn't care less about MLB....it took awhile for me and HIM to figure out it was a case of mistaken identity...OOOPS!
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